The Red Herb Roundup: The Roundup-ening

9/23/12

Here’s last weeks news, this week because my lack of focus wouldn’t let me finish something I started on Sunday until Monday in the A.M.

Welcome back to the Roundup.  It missed you lots.
Last Week in Gaming Tech:

  • So it has come to pass.  The PlayStation 3 Super Slim lives.  Going on sale as soon as this Tuesday, Sony has shrunk their famed console down by 25% (in comparison to current model Slims).  On North American shores, a 250GB SKU will release on the 25th paired up with both Uncharted 3 (GotY edition, no less) and a $30 voucher for the Really-This-Hasn’t-Come-Out-Yet?-F2P-Shooter Dust 514 and will run you $269. Those of you looking to figuratively super size your Super Slim (just…just roll with it), a 500GB model will launch on October 30th, bundled with a freshly printed copy of Assassin’s Creed III – the damage on that honey will set you back $299.  Unfortunately, both the 12GB flash drive model and pearl white edition of the PS3 Super Slim will remain exclusive to Europe and Japan respectively.

Last Week in Games:

  • After selling a whopping one million copies, Capcom has decided to continue supporting their new goblin-smashing IP, Dragon’s Dogma.  By the end of this year, two free modes of play will be offered for download.  Hard Mode is, well, a really hard fuckin’ mode of play for an already punishing game.  Alongside that, a new Speedrun Mode challenges Arisen to blow through the game as quickly as possible.  Both modes are designed for masochists, obviously, but the rewards for your tears are promised to be great.  Announced with a heavier splash of vague, a full-on DLC expansion called Dark Arisen is also being planned for a 2013 release.
  • Once again nabbing the grail of exclusivity, EA has confirmed the Xbox 360 will receive a multiplayer beta for Medal of Honor: Warfighter, the sequel to 2010’s so-so MoH reboot.  Deploying in early October (see what I did there?  Military jargon), a Gold account membership and an itchy trigger finger will be all you need to jump on the beta.
  • Time to dip into Microsoft’s legal department for some news today: it would seem the company has gone and renewed the Killer Instinct trademark.  Before you take this as official confirmation of a Killer Instinct 3, bear in mind an HD rehash is the most viable card in the deck for this license.  In fact, a former Rareware employee went on the record to say that their overlords at Microsoft snubbed their collective noses at the notion of a KI3 a while back, but any Killer Instinct is better than no Killer Instinct, which has been exactly the case for the last sixteen years.
  • But, come on, we jump on HD rehashes like nicotine-coated crack (edible nicotine-coated crack, that is – we’re not animals, after all).  Sega knows this better than anyone after peddling classic after classic in $10 doses.  Next up is the Saturn cult favorite NiGHTS into Dreams… and the phenomenal Sonic Adventure 2.  Both available on PSN Oct. 2nd and on XBLA the 5th, NiGHTS comes with the ultra rare Christmas NiGHTS levels at no extra charge while SA2 twists your arm out of an additional $3 if you desire the Battle Mode add-on.  Chao Karate calls to you.
  • Konami has finally dated the Zone of the Enders HD Collection for October 30th.  Yes, goddamnit, Metal Gear Rising Solid: Revengeancer’s demo will be included in the set, but if that’s your only reason for buying the collection then…I can’t cast the first stone.  There’s a copy of Dragon’s Dogma sitting on my shelf thanks to a woefully mundane RE6 demo added as an incentive…
  • …A demo which has been totally one-upped and demolished by Resident Evil 6’s sublime Public Demo waiting to be downloaded on either PSN or XBLA this very instant.  It’s been out since Tuesday and I can’t rightfully fall asleep without smearing a zombie’s brain pan all over a wall.  It’s utterly cathartic.
  • But if you don’t prefer discharging bullet rounds in your horror games, how about discharging your bowels hard enough to forever ruin your undies instead?  That’s right, folks, the Slender Man returns in Slender: The Arrival, a full retail PC release following the indie success of Slender: The Eight PagesThe Arrival packs better visuals, an intensive storyline, and unrelenting scares.  All it’s missing is a release date.
  • Ending the news reel on a down note, Bioware’s founders – Greg Zeschuk and Ray Muzyka – made public last week that they are retiring from the company they created.  Called “The Doctors of Bioware” thanks to both owning medical doctorates, the duo made parent company EA aware of their departure as early as April of this year.  Muzyka is moving on to entrepreneurial challenges while Zeschuk (who has been more open about his dissatisfaction with the gaming industry) intends to focus on his family, drinking craft beer, and interviewing the people who brew it.

Last Week’s Trailers:

  • Dead Island: Riptide - Slow motion?  Check.  Minimalist score?  Check.  Doomed couple facing a horde of zombies?  Check.  Reverse motion trailer?  Che– Wait, no?  Someone dropped the fucking ball big time.
  • Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance - Many have submitted to the idea that Revengeance will be a great hack n’ slash game but a terrible Metal Gear.  Initial previews showed little narrative promise, yet this one is slightly more heartening when it comes to story.  Either way, Platinum Games has yet to disappoint.  Oh, wait.
  • Yakuza 5 - At first, you may think this trailer doesn’t make sense because it’s in Japanese.  Then you’ll realize it doesn’t make sense because this game is insane.  It’s punched a hole through reason just to take a shit on your sanity.  What you really need to be afraid of is the moment when what you’re seeing starts to make sense.  But by then, you’ll have already killed.

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